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Black Sheep Tries Bleach is an all-original collection of honest humor dealing with daily life and relatable situations. This book is the modern day survival guide for all who have struggled with life’s growing pains—and lived to laugh…

The Kegel

Florence, my 72 year old widowed neighbor, is in incredible shape. Taking her regular evening walk past my house with her two Bichon Frise, Thelma and Louise, I commented that walking must be more beneficial than my gym membership because…

Water Buffalo Breasts

Several years ago, I had a breast reduction.  Now before my male readers yell, "Noooooo", let me explain. Developing at a young age, I went from flat to a 34E in less than a year.  The older men started rubbernecking, construction workers…

Florida Snowbirds and Lovebugs: They're Heeeere!!!

Snowbirds are like lovebugs, and here are some reasons why:   Snowbirds are a species of human that annually migrate to warmer climates from their Midwestern tundra habitats. Heat also attracts lovebugs.   At certain times…

Calories Burned In 30 Minutes

Laughing = 40 Sex for a man = 100 Sex for a woman = 69 Banging your head against the wall = 75 A cold shower = 600 What have we learned? ...humor happens

#FML Moment 122

That moment you realize you're now the adult in the family! FML!!! ...humor happens

Mom and the Fishermen

My mom was out-of-town photographing birds, when two fishermen approached and asked, "Will you give us a jump?" Their battery had died and they were hoping she could help. Her response: "Sorry, I'm a married woman." ...humor happens  …

Maid Service

Your girlfriend does your laundry?  Oh man... She does your dishes too?!  Oh man... ...AND she washes your dog?!!  Oh man, you're lucky!!! As I listen to the guy on my left discuss his buddy's personal life, it occurred to me... all men…

#FML Moment 22

Flirting, you become so flustered when you’re saying good bye, you slam your car door…WITH YOUR HEAD IN IT! When the poor guy asks if you are alright, you reply, “Oh, I'm fine. It happens all the time.” Really? REALLY! FML!!! ...humor…

#FML Moment 12

I went to the doctor for my annual visit last week.  He told me my prostate levels were elevated and I have bi-polar cancer. So, I showed him my testicles and asked if I should be concerned. Geez, I hope Obama Care covers this. FML!!! ...humor…

#FML Moment 24

Running late for church, you trip and fall down the center isle yelling, "Jesus Christ!" Dress above your head, ass barred, as the entire congregation focuses in on your red hot Victoria Secret lace thongs. You stand tall, finishing with, "...is…